Letter to editor:

The new definition of motor mouth — Thanks, Jerry.

Ever wonder where companies find people who can speak at lightening-fast speed at the end of commercials on TV and the Radio? Or reduce the end-of-the addendum presentation one needs the Hubble Telescope to get a clue to what is is telling you?

Spending my formidable years in Philadelphia, fast talking was a way of life for one used car salesman who could accelerate his wrangling from zero sixty in a nano second, stop on a dime and give you ten cents change, and return to super sonic in a flash. He was special, and although no one could understand what the hell he was saying, he sat at the top of the “cool heap.” A disk-jockey called ‘the geater with the heater{“ could introduce a single and provide the record label, the performer, the year, date and where it was recorded, where it stood on the top 100 and the full name, address and studio phone number in just under ten seconds. There was nothing more to it than being an icon and a memory.

Today, providing lightning-fast talk is an accelerated recorded track or robo vocal that a company’s legal department insists on being in the commercial. From a legal standpoint, it doesn’t matter if you personally understood it, as long as it can be argued that it can be understood. It’s read as fast as possible because the company advertising is paying a premium for ad time and minimizing the obligatory disclaimer allows more time for the actual commercial. Liability? None. You were warned.

Car leasing companies are positioning their legal disclaimers at the beginning of their ads perhaps to have us think it is part of a prior ad. Many times a 0% interest rate will be advertised on a car-lease, and the microscopic print will explain quite clearly, if your Hubble is available, the rate is not permanent and will only last for a certain number of months.

And those luring rebates dangled in front of us often times are the after-rebate price of the item as if it were the real price, when the rebate is necessary to get the price to that level in more fine print.

The global moral fiber has pretty much vanished, but maybe by staying vigilant we can shield ourselves from the “geaters of greed.” Thanks Jerry.

Bud deGorgue

Saint Albans City

What do you think?

Write us.

Recommended for you